Thanksgiving will be here in just a few days, so I feel like now is a great time to contemplate the important things in my life…
Like how I’m going to get through Thanksgiving break trapped in my house with both of my children.
Listen, I love them. I absolutely adore them! But they’re noisy. Soooooooo noisy!!! During the day when just my three year old is home, we keep it at around 107 decibels. When my eight year old comes home? Well, I’m not certain it’s possible to measure the amount of sound pumped from those two little sets of lungs combined. According to the chart I just Googled (yes, I did that), pain begins at 125 decibels… I consider that our baseline when the whole family is here.
My children scream just for the pure joy of screaming. I honestly think my life would be complete if I could feel, just for a few moments, the pure jubilation they experience when they are screaming their little guts out. The looks on their faces as they, for no discernible reason, make random noises (Mmmmmm-oooom!!! Mommy! Mmmmm-ama!!!, oh wait, that’s not random, that’s my name) at top volume, are as close to nirvana as one could ever hope to be.
When you add the two loudest dogs in the universe, the tv, and someone who feels the need to listen to an ipod with the speaker on, it is a mixture even earplugs can’t diminish.
Nobody ever tells you that the pitter patter of little feet is deafening.
I’m not gonna lie, there have been days when my ears are literally ringing by bedtime. Peaceful is not a term I would use to describe my household. However, in a weird way, I’m kind of looking forward to the chaos (even if my ears aren’t). I have an hour and a half to myself every week when both of my kids are in school at the same time, and it gets kinda boring after about ten minutes. I like my crazy noisy kids and my super dumb dogs.
So, though I honestly believe that my children are negatively affecting my auditory processing for the long term, I think Thanksgiving break may possibly be survivable. Or I could end up in the corner covering my ears and rocking like a mental patient.
Either way, I am taking the cost of my hearing aids out of my children’s inheritance.